It’s that time of the year again. The weather begins to cool, the days got shorter, and the cuffing begins for all those singles out there. Of course, I’m referring to the phenomenon known as cuffing season in the dating world.
For those unfamiliar with the term, it refers to the time when singles who would ordinarily be looking for something more long-term have to settle for something less in order to get through the colder months of the year.
The desire to be ‘cuffed’ (or shackled) by a meaningful relationship between November 1 and Valentine’s Day inspired the moniker.
Some singles may become lonely as a result of the cold and often unpleasant weather. As well as a lack of outside activities and sunshine, and may shift what they’re seeking or be motivated for the wrong reasons.
What Is the Origin of Cuffing Season?
The origin of cuffing season is a point of contention. Some argue that the colder months make us need the warmth of a body lying next to us. Even if that warm body isn’t the perfect one for us.
Furthermore, because of the pressure from friends and family, people feel a greater desire to be in a relationship during the Christmas season.
Whatever the reasons for its existence, there is some extremely interesting evidence to back it up, which should give any sensible single pause before getting into a relationship right now.
“70 percent of those asked stated they believe people are most motivated to look for a committed relationship in the colder months.” According to an EliteSingles survey. “Fall is a more popular season to look for love than spring (32 percent), summer (17 percent), and winter (13 percent), with 38 percent. Saying they’re personally more inspired to look for love in the fall.”
Hinge, a dating service, also claims that during Cuffing Season, there is a 15% increase in those actively looking for a relationship.
Perhaps most intriguing, Facebook data shows that the largest increases in the number of people who alter their relationship status to “in a relationship” occur between October and February, but the figures reverse in the month after Valentine’s Day.
So, if you’re seeking your forever mate, does Cuffing Season mean you should put your search on hold for a few months and come back in the spring?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no If… IF… you are a savvy single and arm yourself with the necessary tools to focus on excellent mates and sift out the bad ones. There is no terrible time of year to look for love.
I give you a lot more tools in my Conscious Dating Program to safeguard your love life from being cuffed to the wrong partner. But here are my top ten warning signals to watch out for to avoid catching the cuffing season bug.
1. There is a strong sense of urgency to achieve deadlines.
It’s probable that if you’ve met someone online or in-person and they have an intense, possibly abnormal urge to get together with you as soon as possible. They’re feeling the pressure to start the season with you.
2. On the first few dates, they’re making holiday arrangements with you.
Even when it’s not cuffing season, I constantly tell my customers to slow down to speed up. So if you’re dating someone and they’re making Christmas arrangements with you straight away, it’s time to slow down.
3. All they want to do is watch Netflix and chill.
On the reverse side of someone pressuring you to make those holiday arrangements. If you’re seeing someone and they only want to remain in rather than take you out. You might want to reconsider your relationship.
4. The majority of the people in their lives are already married.
If you’re dating someone and discover they’re the only person in their group of friends and family who isn’t married. It’s probable they’re feeling the pressure and passing it on to you.
5. Texts or phone calls that are received at inopportune times
You need to set boundaries for how and when people contact you as a smart single. If the new person in your life prefers to interact with you outside of your boundaries, such as through late-night messages or drunken phone calls, you should find someone else to talk to.
6. Your ex is the warm body next to you.
Cuffing season can have weird effects on our best intentions, like making us overly friendly with our ex. The comfort of a warm person next to you may seem wonderful at first. But it will quickly dissipate if you realize it ended for a cause.
7. Starting in the spring, they won’t make any plans.
A good partner will be talking about constructing a future with you as you get deeper into the season with them. However, if your partner never discusses the two of you outside of the winter, expect the cuffs to come off when the weather warms.
8. They refuse to introduce you to their family or friends.
It’s quite acceptable to be careful about introducing a potential partner to the most significant people in one’s life. But if you feel you’re being kept away from these individuals, you should consider why.
9. Having sex is the most intimate act you do together.
A physical relationship may be exactly what the doctor ordered during these chilly months. But if the physicality is lacking in closeness, the relationship may have you changing your online relationship status sooner than you think.
10. You have a gut feeling that something is awry.
Listen to that little voice in your head that indicates something is wrong with this relationship. If you want to avoid getting arrested in the coming months. That voice will almost always lead you in the right route, so don’t dismiss it when it begins to speak.